Looking through my eyes

Updated: Jan 6

I’ve always taken pride in taking care of others and their needs. Must be inherent. I can remember feeling sorry for kids as far back as elementary school. I never knew that would cause me to attract individuals who weren’t healthy for me

We met on a nice summer day. It was a day I’ll never forget. I was feeling lonely and was at the phone booth trying to reach out to

someone, anyone (young and dumb lol) who wanted to hang out.

Unfortunately, everyone was tied up. As I sat in my car smoking a cigarette, this gray 280z pulled up beside me with two young men inside. The one on the passengers side was very handsome and from what I could see, crammed in that small car due to his height. He was very charming. He seemed to be concerned about my time and him interrupting it. We exchanged numbers and gave each other our middle names

It wasn’t until I met his sister, that I found out his first name. That should have been the first clue. I enjoyed dating him, because he desired the same things as me. I loved going to the beach, listening to the water and seeing the sunset.

Our first date was the beach. We actually sat and talked while writing in the sand. (very romantic) It was as if he were my knight in shinning armor.

He purchased me, my first Dooney and Bourke purse, with more to follow. I can remember him trying to cook for me, having a personal stylist come to the house to do my hair, more bags, silk outfits, nice restaurants and more.

One of the things or should I say another thing that captured my attention, was his belief in God. He had a note to God on his wall going to his bathroom, so that it was a constant reminder to him each morning of who he served

It didn’t take very long for us to get pregnant, because I thought he was sterile…

Our relationship was good until it wasn’t

All of a sudden, my hair couldn’t be out of place, or he would think that it was because of another guy, or if I couldn't answer my phone when he called (Little things that I dismissed as jealousy love initially, eventually took its toll). I would leave him and he would ask for forgiveness and treat me like a queen for 6 months to a year and the cycle would start all over with the verbal insinuations, then intense fellowship ect

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When I look over my life, I can’t help but think of how grateful I am, for every experience and accomplishment I’ve been afforded. All of the people and programs along the way, that helped me to gain